The One Where I Undoubtedly Offend Someone
Posted in crazy people and tagged with crazy people, hand-writing analysis, religion on 05/28/2008 01:07 pm by Jerseygirl89Last night I settled down in bed to watch the end of the Daily Show. Jon was interviewing an author (whose name, and book title, I can’t seem to remember) who had spent time with various “fringe” type groups. One of those groups was a church in Texas – the one run by Reverend Hagee, who may or may not be a buddy of John McCain’s. Anyway, he discussed a retreat he went on with them. New members worked at casting out their personal demons by throwing them up into bags. After working through sin, greed, lust and the other biggies, the new church members were instructed to cast out the demons of hand-writing analysis.
Now, generally I am nervous around people who take the Bible (or the Torah, or the Koran, or the sayings of their cult leader) literally. But I try not to make fun, because I do believe in God – and tolerance. However, some people don’t deserve that respect. The Taliban. Polygamists. People who think that hand-writing analysis is demonic. I mean, seriously?
The, let’s call it the romantic side of me, would love to believe in demons – I would love to believe that child molesters and rapists are actually possessed by demons and not actually humans committing atrocities. But even if you do believe in demon possession, do you really think hand-writing analysis is the province of a demon? Can you see Satan handing out demon assignments, “You- pedophilia, You- spree killing, You hand-writing analysis!”
There are a lot of religious dicta that confuse me, or even repulse me, but usually I can see the (often ridiculous) logic behind them. But I can’t understand how hand-writing analysis – understanding people’s personalities, if you will – would piss God off. Or lead to sin. “Oh my, Sue, the way your letters slant upwards and indicate your self-confidence really turns me on. Let’s throw out all of our morals and do it right here on the desk!” Is that really going to happen? It just doesn’t seem as logical (and pathetic) as forbidding dancing, which can be very sexy. Besides, Sue’s self-confidence could be obvious without anyone knowing how to analyze her handwriting.
I just don’t get it.
May 28th, 2008 at 2:40 pm
Um… I don’t get it either. Sounds kinda far-fetched to me too. Unfortunately, when I hear something like that, I tend to throw out the “far-fetched” with the “could be possible.” And yeah, I believe that there are demons, as well as angels, but 1) I don’t think that there’s probably a demon of hand-writing analysis, and 2) I also believe that people can do good and bad all on their own, without being assisted by either angels or demons.
May 28th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
“Oh my, Sue, the way your letters slant upwards and indicate your self-confidence really turns me on. Let’s throw out all of our morals and do it right here on the desk!”
!LOL!
May 28th, 2008 at 4:35 pm
Dude, I have no idea why people get all freaked out over stuff like that. Seriously. WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL?
May 28th, 2008 at 5:17 pm
Hmm. That’s a new one. Obviously, being religious, I do believe in both good and evil…but I think throwing up demons? Would not work. These people need to watch The Exorcist. And, handwriting? That’s a little extreme.
May 28th, 2008 at 8:57 pm
Ok, I realize that often when you see exorcisms, the afflicted end up puking at some point. I do not see how puking = exorcism. Very, very weird.
May 28th, 2008 at 10:16 pm
Repent! Ye devilish analyzers. I want to be able to tell my followers that is somebody else’s signature at the bottom of that ten grand check made out to that brothel.
May 29th, 2008 at 12:27 am
Greed. Lust. Handwriting Analysis.
One of these things is not like the others…one of these things just doesn’t belong…
May 29th, 2008 at 8:00 am
“Can you see Satan handing out demon assignments, “You- pedophilia, You- spree killing, You hand-writing analysis!””
See, if I had seen that list a long time ago I might have considered the hand-writing analysis gig. The devil isn’t doing a very good job marketing that area of possession.
May 29th, 2008 at 9:33 am
I was shaking my head while reading this because I had never heard that hand writing analysis was a sin or related to demons. As an incest survivor, I refuse to put that in the same league as some of the biggies…I agree with you completely that it doesn’t make sense.
May 29th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
He wrote an article about that church and the camp-type thing he went to in a recent issue of Rolling Stone. It really floored me.
I’m a traditional Jew which means we don’t eat certain things because G-d tells us not to, but I don’t believe in taking it literally. You won’t see me out there stoning my kids for lying to me. I don’t believe in forcing my beliefs on others.
To be perfectly honest, many fundamentalist Christians scare the hell out of me (unintentional pun). That article (which included the reference to handwriting analysis) didn’t help.
I’m a big fan of the author, though, even those his name escapes me.
May 29th, 2008 at 3:15 pm
Mercy Project – Undoubtedly true.
Jess – Gee, you mean that’s never happened to you?;)
Karly – If I knew I’d start my own freaky cult and make myself rich.
AFF – I’m pretty sure these people aren’t allowed to watch R-rated movies. But maybe we should send them a copy anyway?
Wordvixen – Maybe they’re just puking because they’re worn out from all the demon fighting?
Travis – You are a genius. That is the only explanation that makes sense.
Leslie – Teehee. I love you and your songs.
HRH- You are so right. I wonder if I could do it from home? People could send me the hand-writing. . .
canadianflake – I think Travis’ explanation is the only way it does.
Reiza – Oh, I need that Rolling Stone. Fundamentalist anyone scares me. And as far as keeping Kosher, when those laws were written they made perfect sense, healthwise so I get honoring that tradition. I just don’t remember anything – in any ancient texts or traditions – that mentioned hand-writing analysis.
May 30th, 2008 at 5:23 pm
sorry, mommy-come-lately here.
i hate organized religion and the hypocrisy surrounding it all.
your personal relationship with God is YOUR BUSINESS.